New Jersey Councilwoman Finds God

Newark, New Jersey Councilwoman Barbara Raft's office has sent out a short brief detailing how she has finally found God, and put an end to a millennia-long game of hide and seek.

Asked to comment about her Earth-shaking discovery, Councilwoman Raft had this to say:

"He was in the living room. Jesus Christ! He was in the living room! How could I have missed Him for so long?"

The Councilwoman's revelation purportedly came after her son informed her that his super secret hiding spot was occupied.

On a whim, the Councilwoman then walked to her living room, lifted the pillows off her sofa, and found the Great Creator of the Universe.

In response to reporters' questions concerning His discovery, the Alpha and Omega was quoted as saying:

"Come on! Seriously? How long have I been down there? And no one even thought to look under the pillows! It stopped being fun seven centuries ago. Now all I got out of it is the mother of all crimps in my neck."